Fly Away, Gorgeous!

The bird that I cherished the most

The one, I let off to the world

To be with its kind and explore more

Be drunk with the thrills of youth

Have fun with all sorts of mate

***

Don’t only learn but gain wisdom

Don’t just hear but always listen

Don’t only touch but feel deeper

Don’t only see but perceive beyond

Not the brain all the time for you also have a heart!

***

What you think is right can be wrong

Gorgeous, the earth is very vast

Fly away, my sweet gorgeous, fly!

When you’re exhausted with the flight

Remember that I will never leave your side

***

My soul won’t age, my heart won’t get tired

God knows, it hurts knowing it can be me

It’s painful because I want to be there

Yet, I don’t want to tame and cage you

True love is selfless, unconditional and timeless

I’ll just find the joy in waiting

Trust in the will of the Divine

Finding comfort in my unsent love letters

Plenty lovely, young and carefree out there

Not all for keeps nor forever loyal

Knowing me, certainly you know what I mean…

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Love Myself: Exercise

Some people think that they are so good-looking and have the nerve to body shame others… (check the mirror first before you talk)

Only in… I know in my heart that I am thoughtful to others… hope being cruel brought happiness to one’s blemished soul🤬🤬🤬

Judge me as you please. I know too well who I am… Thank u God for creating me for who I am!!!

Thanks for all the blessings and making me stronger each day.

It’s so tiring to go to the gym. But this is my way of taking good care of God’s precious temple in me.

Wicked Dreams

How come the dreams become so vivid each day?

The fantasies are unreal, none will come true anyway

Not allowing my hunger to chew my soul

My thirst that you can satisfy is the evil side of me

Immoral fruits shattered the scent of my innocence

Should I apologise for welcoming you in my wicked dreams?

This church lady is no angel and will never be a saint

All the images created in my head are all wrong

Everything in the wild, voluntarily and willingly share with you

I’m glad that you’re absolutely clueless and won’t find out at all

Don’t judge me to be nasty, I’m a woman too!

From the Sweetest to the Darkest

I am a fan of Sabrina in the Archie comics even until it was shown in tv. I watched all the episodes. Sabrina portrayed by Melissa Joan Hart was flamboyant, bubbly and smart. It was all about the humour and magic.

Well, Netflix did again! After, a decade of resting from TV, Sabrina is back.

I watched the first season’s 10 episodes. The whole gang is also back but I missed the voice of Salem. Why Salem isn’t talking.

Well, the new Sabrina shows the dark side of Greendale and the world of witches. This time round isn’t in the studio. The cinematography and shots are terrific. Well, it’s like Halloween on TV, the scare and horror are on…

Don’t expect to have a good laugh… be scared and be thrilled!!!

The old Sabrina is the sweetest gal in school. The new Sabrina after signing her name in the Book of the Beast was reborn and become the most powerful witch of her generation.

Next in the Queue

Trust the Divine

Instincts doesn’t deceive

Intuition doesn’t lie

No retreat in faith

The Blessed Mother listens

An archangel on the side

Messages in the dreams

Voice of God in signs

Not abandoned at all

No one is born lonesome

Sacrifices be thy strength

Tears morphed into glee

God’s wisdom be the guide

My dear, know it too well

It’s your time, your turn

You’re next in the queue

Not absolute merriment

Fear no evil, stand still

Intervention of thy heavens

Be your courage and shield

Miracles happen unexpectedly

It’s God’s will, “let it be done!”

Smiling Again

Always shy away

Bashful and scared

Scarred in the past

Blessed in the present

Thank God, I’m there

I may not say a lot

My heart knows too well

****

Unspoken, unsaid

Always misunderstood

Used to quiver & growl

Then, I learned to let it be

Acceptance and gratefulness

I am imperfect and so as they

Pretty faces also aged and rot

But a beautiful soul is timeless

Not threatened by numbers

Only bringing joy to the world

Thanks for smiling again

May my thoughtfulness and generosity

Brings true joy and delight in your heart

I love you, boy (if you only knew)

Lyrics for Boy by Timmy Cruz

Oh what a night

‘di ako makatulog (I can’t sleep)

parang tukso tanging laman ng isip (it’s like temptation is in my head)

wala kundi ikaw (no one but you)

bakit ganito?(why it’s like this)

I can’t get over you

kahit sarili ko’y ayaw maniwala (I can’t believe myself)

sa nangyaring ito… oooh! 1 (with what’s going on)

I love you, boy

if you only knew

naiinis na ako sa iyo (I’m irritated at you)

sobrang manhid ka at ‘di mo napapansin (you’re so heartless for you can’t notice)

I love you, boy

kung alam mo lang (if you only knew)

ang puso ko ay nagdaramdam (my heart felt bad)

hanggang kailan ba ako ay maghihintay (until when I will wait)

My foolish heart

ikaw ang may kasalanan (it’s all your fault)

kung ikaw ba’y tumahimik na lamang (if you only keep quiet)

ako’y ‘di naguguluhan (I won’t be confused)

Oh sayang lang (Oh what a pity)

if I were not a woman

sana’y noon pa ma’y aking nasabing (for sure I’ve already confessed then)

ika’y aking mahal (that I love you)

I’m head over heels, babe

i love you so much

i’m going crazy

My foolish heart

ikaw ang may kasalanan (it’s all your fault)

kung ikaw ba’y tumahimik na lamang (if you only keep quiet)

ako’y ‘di naguguluhan (I won’t be confused)

if you only knew.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zvsu_NsgoXk&feature=share

Turn Up the Music

Turn up the music and tune it to the loudest. I feel good despite the tension and the indifference. The most important thing that I found peace deep within. I am so joyful that there are fruits to all the efforts. For the recent days, I said my thanks to the blessings of my friends. I told God, soon it is my turn… I know it will be me—

How You Live (Turn Up the Music)

By Point of Grace

Wake up to the sunlight

With your windows open

Don’t hold in your anger or leave things unspoken

Wear your red dress

Use your good dishes

Make a big mess and make lots of wishes

Have what you want

But want what you have

And don’t spend your life lookin’ back

Turn up the music

Turn it up loud

Take a few chances

Let it all out

You won’t regret it

Lookin’ back from where you have been

Cause it’s not who you knew

And it’s not what you did

It’s how you live

I’d Rather Keep Quiet

Wherever I go, I am known to be the person who does beyond job description …. extra miles…. So, it is difficult for me to comprehend why it was quick for others to calculate what I failed to do. How about what I have done for the children under my care whether paid or not paid? How about those people I am willing to give generously whether I know them or not….

No one questioned me or presumed that I am running away from tasks…

Whatever people will say… no grudges and no hate… Enjoy life in my ways!!!!

Father Eugene said yesterday, “All’s well that ends well.”

My 25 Gifts

In Bohemian Rhapsody song, the last stanza

“Nothing really matters, anyone can see

Nothing really matters

Nothing really matters to me

Any way the wind blows”

“NOTHING REALLY MATTERS AT ALL!!!”

And so that was I thought…

My friend hugged me for a very long time. She said, ‘God will bless you because you have a good heart.’ She also added that I am indeed a beautiful person.

The last day, the party for 25. I saw the joys painted on their faces. How could I question the 25 wonderful gifts God gave to me to whom I made a difference?

I hope my gifts are appreciated for I give with all my heart❤️

Well, I know everything matters wherever the wind blows…

Harsh Winds

Wasn’t it agreed and spoken?

A man should have his word of honour

Otherwise he’s like the butterflies of nowhere

While butterflies flirting with the flowers

I am up completing my tasks

Butterflies leap from flower to flower

Throwing shades and blowing harsh winds

No explanations needed and be defensive

Fulfilling my obligations and kept my words to others

Cruelty to the max, a real man should not

Maybe like a butterfly drawn to the rainbow

Is heart colourful or tainted with black?

It is quick for people to judge

What do they know that’s partly mine??

I don’t show off and announce my deeds

I know my preference and never confused

Thus no harsh winds can blow me away

I am grounded with the strength of the Almighty

What goes around comes around

Do not do unto others what u don’t want others to do unto u

Love is too beautiful…

https://m.ranker.com/crowdranked-list/rumored-gay-actors-celebrities

50 Rumoured Gay Actors Celebrities

No! Chuck from Gossip Girl can’t be one of them… Now, my yesterday’s fantasies all ruined!!!!

Welcome to the new millennium with the unpredictable millennials!!!!

Well, nowadays those who claimed to be charmers of women, the known playboys may also enjoy playing with boys. Nowadays, not all those fishing for women are real men… there are married men who enjoy the company of other men like Brokeback Mountain.

It took Bruce Jenner courage and a long time to come out…. Unlike Freddie Mercury who really embraced his identity in the time when it was easily condemned and hardly accepted by society.

After all, with all respect to all people’s gender preferences.

AFTER ALL, OUR CHOICES DON’T DEFINE WHO WE ARE BUT ON HOW WE TREAT OTHERS!!!

RESPECT

My Lollipop Boy

I was told that I should be the one kicked out. Even if it was a joke, it wasn’t funny…

After all the hard work and all that I started… my extra miles… none was appreciated! I’m only seen as someone frustrating and annoying because I wanted what is the best to be implemented and everything maximised and utilised. I wanted rules to be set and everything in placed.

I was supposed to finalise my painting for the kids in the church but my fear is getting the best of me.

Yet, as I was about to sleep I saw the lollipop a student gave me. He was not in my class but he really bought one for me. I am so overjoyed for the innocent thoughtfulness because in his heart the efforts I made did make a count.

Then, during my last class for the day. I told my students that it was already our last for the year. Most of them exclaimed ‘I or we will miss you!’ One girl gave me a hug saying she would miss me. One of them said, ‘can I stay for awhile? I don’t want to go because I will miss you.’

I am certain that those kids were not saying those words to flatter me. I could sense the innocence and sincerity in them. I’m grateful because in the eyes of the child I made a difference. Hence, all my efforts are not really wasted at all…

My Karma Chapter

“What goes around comes around” and I claimed that this is the part of my life that this line hits me. At the beginning, I almost lost it… I wanted to hide and vanish for the rest of my existence. Questioning the Almighty, ‘why now when it was there then?’ Please, I’m too old for this crap! Didn’t I avow quits… no more… not anymore… This is all the drama and creativity? I never believed and ignored. I lingered for I wanted to play the role of the broken girl coz tragedy sells more than fairy tales.

However, it hurts a little bit. How come some parts of me had this wanting that stirred my emotions only to be paralyzed with fears? So over with usual defense mechanism of not to care and playing tough or acting like a helpless abandoned bird at the corner of trash. Congratulations for I was so over with those tactics! Instead of weeping or pretending, I gave the world my brightest smile… not faking and no more masks…

With all the cold stone heart (exclusively to me only) and obviously the I-don’t-give-a-damn treatment… I learned to find the real me and the goodness I always have. Thanks to this karma chapter of my life, no matter how challenging and discouraging I found my worth. The shadow of inferiorities slowly abandoning my post. Perceiving the light at the end of the tunnel filled with wisdom and optimism. I no longer focus on what I am not but treasure the beauty in me. I received that approval and friendly smiles of two dashing male strangers today. Obviously, I was not hitting on any of them or trying to catch their attentions but I appreciated the friendliness and unspoken appreciations. Like most instances and the usual situations, I would certainly forget their faces. For the truth of the matter, it was not about getting someone but trusting my heart that whatever I feel is real because I am always true….

Those who disapproved at me will surely laugh out loud for my misfortunes. I accept the ridicule as a good sport for in losing, I emerged triumphant for I learned to accept love in my heart minus all the negativities. Nonetheless, this karma chapter taught me to be kinder despite of how others treat me. I am never a player nor I am not living a double life. I have nothing to hide. So, I embrace my freedom with joyful spirit by loving God and all people around me. If this is karma, I am thankful to this because I unraveled who I am and appreciate my blessings more.

It is never about who the person is but how I transformed into a better me… I am imperfect but I love who I am… Not going down with my misfortunes but coming out from the quicksand, climbing up to the ladder… rising up and flying high! Don’t break or have stiff neck… don’t blink even for a second when you behold the beauty in me!!!

My weird platform sneakers, which I love!!! Too old for these… I still pull it off like I used to do more than a decade ago…. Oops, feeling 18 again with my similar Baby Spice sneakers!!! My throwback attire… Or I’m the old Hannah Montana fan who can’t get over with the Disney show… Hey, Miley Cyrus now already passed twerking and nudity…

https://youtu.be/pJ2m9uyF2bg

By Miley Cyrus “The Climb” ost Hannah Montana the movie

Can’t get over u😍😘❤️😇

Lord, that manly scent so close and that K-pop hairstyle! Forgive me, I meant not to commit sins in my thoughts. I don’t want to close my eyes for my fantasies might burn my flesh to hell! Now, I fully understood that there’s an advantage of being unknown and unseen coz staying hidden is a safe place for both of us….

I’ll bring you to my pardise into the kingdom reserved for you. I’ll avow that it’s more than heaven above cloud nine. Hopefully, one day, my exclusive dreams and genuine desires won’t be just blown by the winds of time.

I dreamt that I was barefooted running somewhere… I was not alone for it took two tango. Of course, the music turned the beatings of the hearts… that look drove me nuts! Should I thank God it was all in my head? Hay! What dreams may truly come?

Most people who knew me presumed that I only wear high heels and stilletos. What people don’t know that there are teenage wishes in me that never grow old? These are one of those the brands of sneakers that I wanted to have in my tender years. Well, I’m indeed too old for Hannah Montana, no question about that!!! Who cares??? If I can’t get over being hooked with material stuff, the more I can’t get over with someone as gorgeous as you are❤️😍😘Who gives a—- So what? IDGAF!!! Haters gonna hate!!! I don’t really care!!! Besides, I am absolutely happy, always grateful and very contented!!! It’s up for you to see me too, gorgeous! It’s up to you😘😚😋😉

Can anybody find me somebody to love?

After wasting money from a lousy game and a bad movie, I felt like a loser. So, I digged into my classic songs obsession. Who would possibly thought that Freddie Mercury and the rest of the guys in the band Queen would be brought to life on the big screen? My bro promoted the movie, ‘Bohemian Rhapsody’ ethusiastically that made me to find out more about the front guy of Queen, Freddie Mercury. I watched his documentary and played Queen’s songs all over again. Honestly, my all-time favourite song of Queen is “Somebody to Love”.

The lyrics are so relatable. I don’t want a prince charming, a trophy boy or a debonaire… For in the deepest part of my heart, I hope that the person whom my heart desires the most will find in his heart too that what’s real is not a fairy tale. It knows no boundaries and limitations. I hope he will somehow see to appreciate my little gestures that took me a lot of courage and praying to execute. For others, it’s easy to pursuade and coquer a guy but not to someone like me who lives in a cave and a century old. Being good is my only posession and being locked away from the rest is my safety and security. My values and virtues are my honour and my guiding light in this darkened era dominated by excessive and obsessive used of social media platforms and other forms of technology.

Still I believe that no matter what, I know for certain that I am always true… no disguises and pretenses. NO filter profiles in FB, no vanities in IG and Snapchat… and no lies in Whatsapp, Messenger, Twitter, WeChat, Viber, Tango, Telegram and more…

They said only princesses and pretty faces get the guy…. Well, all I know it’s always the heart that matters for something worth keeping and fighting for— We use or brains all the time, we’ll get tired of thinking and grow old with either dimentia or Alzheimers…. We use our hearts sometimes because the brain may forgets and halts on functioning… the heart always remembers and that joy is price that no treasure we cherished can buy….

You’ll know… you’ll see… you’ll feel… not to satisfy your flesh but to give a warmth in your for the rest of your existence….

Can anybody find me somebody to love

Ooh, each morning I get up I die a little

Can barely stand on my feet

(Take a look at yourself) Take a look in the mirror and cry (and cry)

Lord, what you’re doing to me (yeah yeah)

I have spent all my years in believing you

But I just can’t get no relief, Lord!

Somebody (somebody) ooh somebody (somebody)

Can anybody find me somebody to love?

I work hard (he works hard) every day of my life

I work ’til I ache in my bones

At the end (at the end of the day)

I take home my hard earned pay all on my own

I get down (down) on my knees (knees)

And I start to pray

‘Til the tears run down from my eyes

Lord, somebody (somebody), ooh somebody

(Please) can anybody find me somebody to love?

Everyday (everyday) I try and I try and I try

But everybody wants to put me down

They say I’m going crazy

They say I got a lot of water in my brain

Ah, got no common sense

I got nobody left to believe in

Yeah yeah yeah yeah

Oh, Lord

Ooh somebody, ooh somebody

Can anybody find me somebody to love?

(Can anybody find me someone to love)

Got no feel, I got no rhythm

I just keep losing my beat (you just keep losing and losing)

I’m OK, I’m alright (he’s alright, he’s alright)

I ain’t gonna face no defeat (yeah yeah)

I just gotta get out of this prison cell

One day (someday) I’m gonna be free, Lord!

Find me somebody to love

Find me somebody to love

Find me somebody to love

Find me somebody to love

Find me somebody to love

Find me somebody to love

Find me somebody to love

Find me somebody to love love love

Find me somebody to love

Find me somebody to love

Somebody somebody somebody somebody

Somebody find me

Somebody find me somebody to love

Can anybody find me somebody to love?

(Find me somebody to love)

Ooh

(Find me somebody to love)

Find me somebody, somebody (find me somebody to love) somebody, somebody to love

Find me, find me, find me, find me, find me

Ooh, somebody to love (Find me somebody to love)

Ooh (find me somebody to love)

Find me, find me, find me somebody to love (find me somebody to love)

Anybody, anywhere, anybody find me somebody to love love love!

Somebody find me, find me love

Songwriters: Freddie Mercury

Somebody to Love lyrics © Sony/ATV Music Publishing LLC

At the corner of the world

If I’ll put all those series of dreams into words,

A beautiful story will be born for everyone

Not only to ignite the imagination of the dead

But to awaken sleeping hearts hopeless in love

For we exist not only to survive and be the victors

On this winding road, at the highway of nowhere

We found each other on the web of no escape

None of us is divine, we can be friends and foes

Yet, at the corner of the world, far from your reach

Dwelling all by myself, comforted by your thoughts

I could only be my old school ways and hibernate

For living in the wild where I used to be before

Indirectly hurting the ones who owed me nothing

The guilt tortured me, my sensitivity at its brink

Only my tears became my comfort in isolation

I’d rather be discreet and unknown from the rest

At the corner of the world, anonimously yours

Scribbling sweet love letters unsent to your mail

Coz I’m Bad…

My immaturity crawled to my spine, poisoning my brain and darkened my heart. “It’s the triumph of the young, rich and pretty!” I had no edge at all. I am already thrown out of the ring even before I entered the arena.

What did I do? And she was there again… 🤯😡😡🖤😡🤯🤬 Where was he? He always came to the rescue for her sake. I was very unfair because I didn’t even talk to the person. Forgive me Father for this darkness within me. I should not feel this way.

I am not talking! No way!!! I wanted to be where I am… Yet, a smile and friendliness put out the fire in my soul.

What was my problem? How dare me to utter those words? When a friend mentioned his real whereabouts, my conscience was so disappointed at me for my false allegations.

Why did I jump into conclusion and judge him immediately? Why was he not angry when he was there? At that point of time, I was expecting him to be mad (kinda used to it) but he wasn’t.

Forgive me Father coz I am bad… I am really bad girl yesterday😬😭

I kept repeating in my head the words from 1Corinthians 13… to remind me of how badly I acted at that instance.

“Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5 It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

8 Love never fails.

Indeed, what was wrong with me then? I should be truly happy. What’s with this strange feeling anyway? I won’t surely dare to ask forgiveness face-to-face coz I’m also a coward. So what if I am no match for any of them? There’s one thing that I am certain, I will surely love him above all and I’ll bring him pride, honour and happiness. With all my abilities, I’ll make heaven on earth for his sake. After life, I’ll go beyond the depths of hell to bring his soul to heaven.

Batman is No Saint But He Saved Me😉😇

This morning I was up very early to say my prayers to all the great men and women of God. I recalled last Saturday when I shared to the kids the stories of few saints. It never occurred to me that I would be a storyteller again. Actually, I am not really confident with how I pronounced some words using a foreign language. Besides, I sounded awful…. Moreover, I was probably convincing and brought the saints life stories real to the kids. Well, I thought that I am only a storyteller to my younger cousins and siblings during my tender age. But who I am naturally came out effortlessly.

Then, last night I sent to the parents of the children in my session a message reminding them to bring their children along for ‘All Saints’ Day’ mass this evening. I was rushing to make it for the 6pm mass because I wanted to make it while the church’s office was opened so that I could donate in honour of my Papa and twin grandmas for tomorrow’s mass.

On my way to the church, a girl who used to be in my session was in same bus with me. Then, a boy who was also in my session last year, I met when I was waiting for my turn in the washroom. After the mass, a bashful girl ran towards me with her younger sister to greet me ‘Happy All Saints’ Day!’ Hence, I am so grateful for the good deeds I did and the opportunities to serve the Almighty.

Nevertheless, some people mocked and misjudged religion. This morning I was reading the comments in one of the episodes of ‘Deadly Women’, which were negative impressions about religion. One commenter stated, ‘how come there were a lot of religious people involved in murders’. Well, the comment was illogical and no statics proof. For me, the person should watch all ‘Deadly Women’ episodes to uncover that in the show they feature a lot of female killers from different walks of life who experienced various mental and emotional turmoils. Another added that religious people have low IQ. For me, one’s intellect is not basis of faith. There’s nothing erroneous with religion but too much of it can lead to undesireable consequences. Please, stop using religion for personal interests and gains.

Well, the bottom line of everything that I wouldn’t manage to get through today smoothly without Batman’s help. Guilty as charged. Captain America is always my favourite but thank you very much Batman. Indeed, Batman is not a saint but he saved me today! See, you don’t have to be a saint or constant churchgoer to be a good Samaritan to others. I am grateful of the gesture and darkness’ knight made my day.

Sometimes we ceased and refused to perceive each other’s goodness. Yet, there are situations schemed by God to let us be who we really are… We are all beautiful people!!! Batman is the most gorgeous among all superheroes…. Right, gorgeous? My most heartfelt thanks…