Bloodstain in the Past

  
With a deep sigh and teary eyes she told herself, “I don’t blame them. What do they know with what happened?”

Was it what she wanted? Was she ready? Was she faking it all for another’s enjoyment?  It was all her fault for she was old enough to know.  However, in her sheltered world, she only obeyed the rules and lived by the sacred commandments.  True, she maybe more than half decades older still she knew nothing about anything.

It was the day she convinced herself that it was a must.  She was definitely scared and every cells in her shaking.  She hid her fears and wore the vest of bravery.  ‘No, I don’t need this…’  Still she acted cool and foolish.

The tiger did come at night taking away her pride slaughtering her each day.   She scribbled her lies in artistic way and told a fairytale concealing the tragedy and escaping the trauma.   

Was it her fault? Why she turned out to be the evil queen in her story? All the words of discouragements and discrimination made her see so little of her being.  Was it love?  Nope, love isn’t selfish and one-sided.  Love is meant to be shared and not to be abused.  

Amidst her stupidity, her faith and sanity were still tact. Everyday in the square room, she wanted to yell to let the pain go away.  The suffering was prolonged.  The kind of devotion, which left her scars and bloodstain internally.  How she despised all them!!! They should rot in hell where they belong!!!

When she was about to be back in the track, every move led her backwards to her bloodstained past.  She was unpredictable for there was so much hurt to bear that lingers within.   She wanted to feel for real but maybe he was right ‘no one will ever give a damn’.  So, she walked away into the dark room, crying out loud for the wounds seemed not to heal and the bloodstain in the past still there.

  

By Evanescence “My Immortal”

  

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