Just Say the Words that I Can’t Say

I was there taking good care of you and waited patiently until you recovered your strength and opened your eyes.  Then, there were girls who walked in… Good heavens you were awake but you stood ignoring the joy in my eyes.  You walked out from me ignoring my presence, as if I was a ghost and didn’t exist at all.   My heart was bleeding continuously as I watched you merrymaking with them.  How could you possibly not see the goodness and purity in me?  I wept and yelled for your name repeatedly.  I was not heard.  You chose them over me.  I felt all the sadness consumed my hope and faith.

What was really deadly inside?  I witnessed how they made fun and ridiculed you.  You were enjoying but it came with a price.  How naive were you not to suspect that you were used and what you had was untrue!  Stupid!!! Why you couldn’t tell!!! Then, you were in trouble and abandoned.  I was there if you only knew all this time.  You indirectly hurt me all over and over again but I still care so deeply.  I reached out and wanted to be there.  Yet, you were blinded with your silly beliefs and pride.  What should have I done to convince you?  Tell me, please…

Words don’t come easy to me.  Just say… I’ll be there and I will never leave… Just say and I’ll love you forevermore….

Another bad dream… Those words ringing in my head and the scenes again and again,  I am just overly concerned over nothing.  It was all pointless and meaningless.  Yet, what I had inside, all unsaid but it’s all the truth.  All you have to do is say… Just say the words that I can’t say…

Perhaps, I am just missing you…   


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