I am not expert in loving romantically. All my life, I kept on supressing my feelings and get over whatever sickness that hit me. Thus, I never tried and my career and my family were my priorities.
Then, in the longest time, I felt the need to share my love. My heart sought for special someone. I tried my friends’ suggestions but none worked the same to me.
In a dream, my father suggested that I would pray. At the end, I listened to him and sought God’s aid to lead the way and let the flower of love bloom inside my bossom.
Somehow what I asked was not easy and found love in the hardest and complicated way. A kind of love that made me courageous and dared me to break the rules. Different emotions collided but in my vulnebarability, I found the beauty and goodness in me. I don’t hate the one I love because in him I found a real friend. He has no idea, how special he is…
There are limitations in my situation. Even if I wanted to kiss and hug him, I controlled myself for I respected him. I just gave to him what he really wanted and asked from me. I am only apologetic of failing him due to so many circumstances.
Undeniably, this love I have for him happened once in a blue moon. I don’t have another life, I just express my love and let that person how important he is to me.
I had an accident awhile ago, there was so many blood and I almost fainted. Fortunately, my cousin was a nurse and she knew first aid. I am really scared but I joked by saying that it happened to drive away all bad luck and evil spirits.
So, after the incident, I took my phone and had courage to keep in touch through music just to let him know that I am here and I missed him. I felt alright in that way, at least I am able to express what I have been keeping for so long. If the worst happened tonight, I wouldn’t let him know at all that even from afar I still cared and his welfare concerned me for I truly value him with all my heart.
This love is once in a lifetime, and I want to spend my lifetime with you.