Don’t want anyone, Gorgeous!

I long for a touch and just a little kiss

Your dazzling gaze, I truly miss

Your naughty smiles are enough

Make my heart giggle and laugh


On the streets and everywhere

Unlimited options are available

I’ve seen one and known them all

I don’t want anyone but only you


To Mary I pray tonight, let it be

I have faith in your judgments

My guardian angel will be your guide

Gorgeous, let’s be in heaven soon


No masks, no skeletons in my closet

God knows that I love you dearly

If my Papa can speak from the grave

He’ll say, “my girl is devoted to you!”

Today is the mass for the Feast Day of the Assumption of the Blessed Virgin Mary. Speaking of Mary, thank you Lord for answering my friend’s prayers. I am very happy for her. She’s the proof that a good and tough woman will stay foot.

I’ve seen them this morning. With my confidence in God, there were no more pangs of anger and envy deep within. Yes, they’re all pretty, petite and young. However, nationality and physical attributes are not assurance for someone to stick around and these qualities don’t justify the genuity of one’s heart. Can looks make you happy forevermore? What will happen when physical beauty diminish with time?

Anyway, I don’t know them— Let the Almighty enlighten your mind… the wisdom of God is yours, my everdearest Gorgeous!!!!


Whoops… Gorgeous!

Whoops kirri whoops kirri whoops

Everytime I see you

Whoops kirri whoops kirri whoops

I want to know you

Whoops kirri whoops kirri whoops

Hope you feel the same too

And I go whoops kirri kirri kirri whoops

I think I love you

Baby all your friends saw my eyes set upon you

I went crazy running in circles just to know you

Boy don’t you kiss me pretending you don’t see me

Don’t be blind, ease my mind, please be kind and love

Gorgeous! It’s a green, greenest grass of all!

Welcome back to both of us! In case you didn’t notice, the grasses are greener on my side. Way much healthy that no time nor sun can wither or destroy. What you didn’t know, I won with the power of my words. Thanks Dr Jose P Rizal, my fave and national hero! It’s true, the pen can be a weapon!

Well, are you green? Of course, you’re incomparibly beautiful than anything or anyone else. Hush, my sweet darling! My prayers are yours!!! Good night!

Gorgeous, Seasons in the Sun


Goodbye to you my trusted friend
We’ve known each other for more than five years
Together we’ve laughed and chatted a lot
Learned about God and harshness of love
Goodbye my friend it was hard to say goodbye
When all the birds were singing in the sky
Now the days of togetherness are over
Handsome boys are everywhere
Think of me for I’m always here


We had joy, we had fun
We had seasons in the sun
But the places we’ve been
Were just seasons out of time


We had joy, we had fun
We had seasons in the sun
But the food and the song
Like the seasons have all gone
We had joy, we had fun
We had seasons in the sun
But the wine and the song
Goodbye my friend, see you someday
When all the birds are singing in the sky
Now that the spring is in the air
With the flowers everywhere
I wish that we could both be there




I’m flying without wings, Gorgeous!

Things happened unexpectedly and gone wrongly for me to savour the real essence of life’s delights. The sight of heartbreaking remnants of war and the depressing reality of the marked will never be erased in history’s timeline. The dead will never have the chance to speak out; yet, those who go on existing will keep on moving forward with the past and its forerunners as their ideals and inspirations.

Pigeons flying everywhere, Gorgeous. Then, I closed my eyes while I flew with them to the realm where we both belong. Our teachers in faith maybe different and our ways of expressions are different, I still believe that there’s the same God who look after us whether we’re awake and asleep. It’s never a question of which religion is which for it is a matter of who we are to ourselves, to others and to the Almighty. We can be who we are but we can never forever hide in deceptions and lies. Justice is always served and the truth will always prevail.

Old school me… well, I am writing again similar to how I used to do it on those days. Sounding like an old grandma reincarnated to spread karma for everyone. All I want to say that I had joy, I had fun… like the season in the sun. Nothing really beats the era of black and white, betamax, ponograph record player and more… time has changed but I am joyful indeed….

Fake-a-Boo Has Touched Down, Gorgeous!

My blood did boil yesterday, Gorgeous… Thanks for allowing me to do my good deeds and it helped me cool down. Anyway can hate me but don’t involve my angels or the job I love and enjoy doing.

But today my fake-a-boo had travel this far… Wait, a minute– what an exhausting day!!! However, I left with a smile—share the love. And you’re heartily welcome❤️😘

When I was above the clouds, I felt dancing with the cherubs and very closed to God. I am all by myself but I am braver. God is indeed in control!

It rained when I went out from the cab. I am willing to let go. So what if I am a foreigner? Everywhere there’s a place for a dreamer who are willing to share God’s gifts and blessings!!!

I’ll surely miss you, Gorgeous! I wanted to take good photos. Yet, I trusted my insrincts. Don’t give witches reasons to cast their disappearing spell. I will be out soon… No need to find fault and be nasty!

Chill and Relax, Gorgeous!

In case you don’t know, I did notice. Again, comments to myself. Indeed, what a long day! Relax, Gorgeous… a king gets exhausted too! Chill for in this jungle of towering skyscrapers, we can’t escape the challenging purpose of our existence. In the silence, may you have a good rest. After all, you did a good job! I told my sis that I am disappointed of myself because I am using an expensive equipment but all my shots were disasters. I studied for what???? I wanted to change settings but as usual when I am in the situation, I blackout… Honestly, I am prone to mental… not a quick thinker… Always the late rwaction girl!!!

Have a good rest!!!! New style??? Well, what’s new when suits you perfectly? It’s true that I am good with words. Yet, one thing that I am certain.., I am such a bad liar!!!

Others don’t have shoes, Gorgeous!

Indeed, I am fortunate to be blessed wity many things. I am watching a documentary of 13 siblings among them there are 8 gays and 1 lesbian. Then, the youngest among the gays moved me. The older ones never finished secondary and don’t even have a stable job. The youngest one continues his study, he cooks some snacks and sells the food. The little earnings he has, he gives some to his mother. Then, he is saving for more than a month to buy a pair of slippers that costs around $2.50 SGD.

What an eye-opener! Thank you, Lord! Gorgeous, aren’t we fortunate???

God bless and good night!!!

Hakuna Matata, Gorgeous!

Hakuna Matata!

What a wonderful phrase

Hakuna Matata!

Ain’t no passing craze

It means no worries

For the rest of your days

It’s our problem-free philosophy

Hakuna Matata!

Father Michael said, “FAKE IT TO MAKE IT!”

Let them be, let them… hakuna matata to all of them… One thing for sure, I am always— I don’t use my drama to win others sympathy! I don’t pretend or fake it to win others!!!!

I watched Lion King today, Papa and Mufasa reminded me about you. I don’t see the stars after the long dinner with a friend. But, I know in my heart that you’re watching me and you never stopped loving. Sounds like what you always told me, ” Hakuna matata!” Why should I worry with the witches of Saintville when there are fairies and wizards whose magical powers are greater than theirs? I slept around 4am today, Papa. My hard work won’t matter to those whose hearts are worst than Scar’s. Well, God is control as you always reminded me, Papa. Let God be God!

Frown no more, Gorgeous! Don’t be annoyed… Hakuna Matata to you! Always find in your heart that I mean no harm and I am always true!

Today is as Lovely as You, Gorgeous!

What a lovely day!

Beside you, my heart explodes!

Tongue-tied, love you most!

My old pair of high heel plump is occupied for the day. Call me near for I am always here…. the loyalty award goes to me! I am always contented this way, always reserved and quiet. By the way, you’re always handsome as can be. Those high voltage dreams are ours to keep. By the way, that’s the haiku poem exclusively and especially made for you.

You’re such an Angel, Gorgeous!

Do you believe in angels, Gorgeous? You should because you’re one of those who have invisible wings.

Thank you, Gorgeous for being such an angel. What do you know, the little kindness you’ve done means a lot to me. You’re a blessing to your love ones and to everyone else and because of your good deeds, I received other’s sincere generosity.

May my guardian angel watch while I am asleep! See, you again gorgeously Gorgeous!

When the Night Falls, Gorgeous…

I have no mouth nor lips

The feelings supressed

Drown myself in the tasks

Be always the good girl

Extending hands to many

How can I ignore you?

Obviously, hidden

So many words in here

Buried deep, unuttered

Gorgeous, when the night falls

I wish that I can be them—

So that I can kiss you too

If there’s more, why not?

Every time the night falls

I hold you in my heart

I cherish you in my mind

Whispering, ‘good night…

Sweet dreams & God bless!!’

Been there, Gorgeous

I saw one I’ve seen them all

Honestly, just be delightful in all you do

Your running your own show

Be always be the gorgeous you

Something true shouldn’t know envy

My heart is trembling and overjoyed

Not because I made a child frustrated

One did cry. Who said editing is a piece of cake?

New things to learn and many good words

Numerous things to fill my portfolio

Thank you for those good people

Reminding me that indeed I’ve done a good job

A number of them told me so today!

The Gift of Innocence, Gorgeous…

I am on the verge of my breaking point. This is me again being stupid! Welcome to the world of grownups whereby your good deeds are forgotten while your minute undoing is spread like a wild fire. Some people only look at the tiny stain of my beautiful dress. Something last minute came and so I had to cancel my appointment… People think that it’s easy… why don’t they give it a shot? Your highness is only good in ordering around…

Honestly, I am a better writer in my younger days and vocabulary then was vast. Now, I am just scribbling some thoughts that won’t interest anyone. At least, I have some outlet and diversion—- Do I know how to put into words my angst and boiling emotions?

Playing the rewind button today, a child rushing into my room today. She gave me something and exclaimed while catching her breath, “I made this for you.” It was the most precious gift that I received today. Her gift of innocence reminded me of my own because my deeds and thoughts used to be not polluted with such wrong intentions. I only want to cheer and make others happy. I don’t live a miserable life maybe those children seen it in me. I am no longer hiding my tears beneath my smiles.

Truly for such innocent heart with pure admiration for it reminded me what I truly am inside. Gorgeous, wish you knew but I am glad you don’t…

Where do sunflowers grow, Gorgeous?

My heart doesn’t beat anymore. All the fear and hopelessness uplift me the space of nowhere. Nonetheless, here you are lighting up the room. You’re as radiant as ever like the sunshine in my poorly lit room. Hey, Gorgeous! I’m glad you don’t know my secret. I am as relax as ever even if I am trembling inside. Well, that shirt matches your tone like bright sunflowers on the field. Where do sunflowers grow, Gorgeous? Of course, they grow in our hearts full of beauty and goodness. It maybe rainy nowadays but it is always summer because sunflowers bloom within us forevermore.


Save Me from this Hell, Gorgeous!

Singing is never my cup of tea but my friends insisted that I should give it a try. Well, my audience were very supportive for they sang along. Does my faith and optimism stand a chance knowing the darkest of deeds always find their ways to destroy me? I’m truly grateful that my aunt gave me a call to cheer me up. Even if I am an orphan to the ones who claimed my own still there are those who sincerely care and very compassionate. The reality was, no one bothered what I felt ever since my father departed this world. I am only needed for convenience, as if I owed the world what I achieved. Did any of them sit for my exams, work on my projects and pay my school fees? The truth, I suffered and struggled on my own but willingly shared my blessings to many. I am about to be tossed to hell. Save me, Gorgeous! Save me! But your life is perfect, you never known the pain I have inside.

Help me for I am full of sorrow and my life isn’t enchanted that a magic wand can rescue me to escape the wicked. No matter what, happy ending is for everyone because God is never asleep, Gorgeous. This ache is my misery that keeps on bothering me but I still find joy in everything for this hope for me and so as to plenty of people across in the world.

I am never alone nor broken for there’s powerful magic brighter than the sun.

The Heart of the Matter, Gorgeous!

There she goes again, attacking and bossing me around. Did she ever know the word appreciate and praise? Well, isn’t it lonely up there? Enjoy the throne for in Storybrooke the Evil Queen was unable to find happiness until she let go of her envy of Snow White.

Those words she said got into me. Will it really satisfy her to get rid of me? Good riddance! For the first time in forever, I woke up very late around 7 plus AM. With a heavy heart, I had second thoughts of attending the talk. Worst of all, I didn’t make it for the payment deadline. Then, when I was on the train that I read the email of the changed of timing. I still went on even I am disoriented and disheartened. So, I alighted somewhere to take the cab but despite of my efforts I was already an hour late. I couldn’t even find the venue and without knowing I asked a priest (I spoke to him so casually. Forgive me, Father for my ignorance). Well, I was apologetic and didn’t make any excuses. I was only honest about my mistake of not reading the e-mail from them.

Gladly, I sat there unprepared. Yet, I took the virtue that I will keep until the wind will blow so hard that I’ll be thrown to Oz like what happened to Dorothy. Well, Emerald City is way much better than Kansas. After all, the heart of the matter is always my genuine and vulnerable heart. No matter how the upcoming attacks will be, I’ll try my best to be true to myself and always bear mind to think positively all the time.

Me and Many Excuses, Gorgeous

Perhaps, I was born in the cave because I don’t know how and don’t even get it. I said this and that. Lame. Excuses, excuses… Me and my many excuses.

Dear God, I pray that you give me the wisdom to understand others. Give me patience and gentleness so that I am slow to anger and not quick to judge. Mold my heart to be like yours, humble & meek and fast in seeking for forgiveness and granting it to others.

Gorgeous, you hear that! I brought work to do at home but I went home late because I went to meet up old colleagues. I am always loved even with the toughest of them all.

Let’s Play, Gorgeous!

Say what you want to say

Thinking of you, night and day

Will we ever find the way?

For the meantime, let’s play!

On your arms, I’ll lay

Merriment is ours not gray

At times, you may astray

Forever loyal, never betray

I mean it that ‘I’m here to stay’

Gorgeous, please steal away

This heart that always obey

Each day you take my breath away

I truly admire you since yesterday

I deeply care then and today

Always loving you everyday

Even in the cold light of day

Are you naughty? Let’s play!

You save me from the rainy day

No worries! Gorgeous, let’s play!

Will I be exalted to heaven, Gorgeous?

Two options: be exalted in heaven or go straight to the netherworld. It is either tough or easy. Nonetheless, I am bound to my angst causing me to lose my hope and faith recently. Perhaps, one of those dry season. Yet, didn’t God provide food and water to the Israelites after they left Egypt and stayed in the desert for 40 years? God even reminded them to take what was enough for the day. The Israelites were very fortunate because their daily bread was the manna from heaven. Indeed, God always provide and He sees the need of His people.

Gorgeous, look at us! We are so different from one another that we can never be two peas in a pod. Yet, are differences make us who we are, distinct from others… never try so hard to blend the crowd. Come on, we are naturallt likeable in our many ways. Gorgeous, can’t you see? Or can you feel? Let us be brave! Have courage, Gorgeous! Don’t mind whatever they’ll say? What do they know anyway?

Good night, Gorgeous! Sweet dreams and see you always! Kiss you as the moon smiles at both of us. Gorgeous, be joyful and don’t frown anymore… You look scary that way…

I fit, Gorgeous! Hurray!

Almost six years of waiting but atlast I finally worn it. Well, this is one of those moments when I congratulated myself exclaiming, “Yes, I told you so!” It was more than half a decade when someone sold me a peach dress. Honestly, I am pretty aware of my body size and declined the offer. “Lady please, the dress won’t fit me,” I said those words. Then, she replied, “no worries, I believe that you can lose weight!” Come on, it wasn’t the sales talk that got me. I didn’t want to argue and she gave me a good deal that convinced me to get the dress. Some teenage obsession wasn’t easy to get rid because I only proved that I am forever the Spice Girls’ fan.

When I tried fitting the dress when I was home, I couldn’t even zip it on my own and my mother tried her best too in helping me to move the zipper up. No matter how I held my breath, still the zipper wouldn’t close. So, I told my mother to repair it by adjusting the size. Nevertheless, she told me that there was nothing she could do because the dress was uniquely sewn and there was no allowance on it for any adjustments. If I insisted with what I wanted, the dress’ design would be ruined. In addition, the zipper alone couldn’t be procure at any shops. In conclusion, I bought a clothing that became my dilemma. What would you expect! Indeed, Victoria Beckham is not just a trendsetter but a lady of class and high quality. Moreover, when I wanted to give it to my sister, she found it not her taste. So, I kept it somewhere in my wardrobe for a very long time and surprisingly didn’t give it away.

Last night, I was so engrossed with my twisted fairy tales series entitled “Once Upon a Time” that I almost forgot preparing what to wear for work the next day. While scavaging my cabinet with what to wear, the old dress caught my eyes because I never worn it ever since and still it looked new. No harm on trying. So, I put it on and I managed to zip it on my own. Really??? What a disbelief!!! Hurray!!!! I fit on that dress, Gorgeous! I did… I managed to wear it comfortably for the whole day. My self-made sauna did work after all!

My patience did pay off. Patience, Gorgeous. Patience is all I have and it’s all I need.

Oops, I said not a single word. Comments and compliments reserved and unsaid. The new captain reported. Hello, sir…You’re as gorgeous as ever! Nice new look and style!

Words are all I have, Gorgeous!

Today is Bible Sunday and the gospel reading was about the good Samaritan. Despite of the uncertainties coming, I’m still doing the best I can. I will continue on believing and have faith. I survived all the heartbreaks and I’ll continue surviving.

Indeed my prayers and poems are all words but every lines rooted in my heart. Perhaps, you define happiness as what you have now and the people around you give joys to you according to the words in your definition. But, is that all enough? Is that how your story goes?

I am boring but I enjoy being at home doing my chores and doing crafts on my own. I don’t care what others will say for my greatest flaw is my honesty. I always say the truth and even in reality I am deprived that chance to prove who I really am and what I can do… at least here I am free to say how much I deeply care despite of alienating me and despising my existence. Period is the end of a sentence but this story has a lot of chapters… more sentences about to be written…

Magnanimous Me, Gorgeous!

I was already there but I went back to find a boy! My sister dropped by and the pain in my stomach sent me to drowsiness distracting me to fulfill my duties. I made a promise that I ought to keep. There were candles everywhere even in the shower. So, I left without taking a bath (which was so unlikely me). I kept nagging at my sister that I would be late and tardiness was no longer an option for me. I definitely outgrown that habit! She told me that there was a shortcut somewhere but we ended up in the wrong direction. I told her that we should cross the road to get a cab but she disappeared, only to find an old friend under the waiting shed. It was like an old disc of my life played backwards in front of my sight. I was in that car again but this time I am conscious. The very fast speed made me screamed out for my sister’s name but then I shouted someone else’s name whom I never met nor known a decade ago. The next thing I knew, I am thrown into the clouds but a voice told me to go back because I forgot someone. ‘Who?’ my old self asked. Then, I landed into an ongoing shadow play happening offshore. Again, from the top of my voice, I was yelling for that same name all over again. Suddenly, I was on a somewhat roller coaster ride. There were voices telling me that it was the owner of that name who did that to me out of mischievousness. The revelation confused me because that person existed, heard and seen me all this time without me knowing or noticing it. Afterwards, I am brought back to an old place, a merged places of my friends and my aunts. Finally, I was taking a bath without any clothes on… then, there was that boy staring… I am a grown up woman, more than a decade younger than I am now… that boy shouldn’t make me feel uncomfortable. After all, he was just a boy but I hid my nakedness from him. I hurriedly went out with my aunt and that boy was a teen when I met him at the door. I didn’t know if it was when I reached my destination or left that place when I saw a grown up version of that boy. That voice whispered in my head again. My response was, ‘so, I came down from heaven for a boy?’ Did I? Will my magnanimity reach out to him in the world he has always known to be real?

Well, I am currently told to spoil market when it was never my intention because in my heart I was only doing what I was told and I am always willing to help like I used to do. I am also told that I am a show off when I displayed my artworks but within me, I am only decorating and adding colours to a place using my love of art. I am judged for hiding and not cooperating when in fact I was doing what was unnecessary to explore and share different ways of learnings. As much as possible, I tried my best not to waste my time taking breaks dining or chitchatting… was it stupid to aim to be productive? Or I am despised because of my desire to be there for others using my God-given skills and talents? I am not a control freak but I am always misunderstood. All I wanted is peace and also share to make others joyful. However, whether its shallowness or darkness… may the blind can see, the deaf can hear, the truth will be spoken and justice will prevail in time.

I did two sessions today. It was quite tiring but I learned an important virtue, which was magnanimity. All this time, I felt stupid for always being there for others when I knew behind the scene I am labeled as the black sheep in the flock. Now, I realised that I am just being magnimous because it is my nature. Indeed, I did something extra for my angels, not to get their approval but to compliment and be generous to them. For all of them are known and welcome in my realm. The God I follow is the same as others and I know that He was there for Abraham, Jacob, Isaac and Moses… and He abides in me too forevermore. The plagues aren’t happening only in Egypt. It is going tonhappen too the descendants of pharaoh-like, their stubborness and cold-heartedness will bring difficult consequences in their lives. Well, Ramses II was only shakened with the death of his first born. The loss isn’t mine when I am gone! It is a preparation for a feast because I am feeling like one of the liberated Hebrew slaves centuries ago for God will also bring me too to a new place with overflowing milk and honey. It is where my talents will be known again as how it is always been and my good intentions will not be taken wrongly. I hope no more lies, bitterness and misjudgements to shatter the goodness in my heart and soul.

Gorgeous, are you the knight or the king?

TGIF and get wasted??? Not for me. I am resting because of cramps and a friend did give me a call to do extra session. Well, all for you my Lord!!!

As I was reading for tomorrow’s session, the virtue of magnaminity reminded me of the story of King Arthur. How can I forget, my classmates called me Queen Guinivere (King Arthur’s wife)! I am not a cheater or double timer… never was and never will! They even called me Cleopatra… I am not a playgirl… not my fault if a lot of boys smiled and were friendly to me. Worst of all, I was even the White Queen (X-men mutant). Come on, I never used my feminity to manipulate or lure the opposite sex. Well, I was always referred to be the queen when all I wanted was my liberty and peace.

Those were the days when I was torn between the king and knight in my thoughts. Sounds, legit drama which all played in my head as always because all I did was ignore people and hide…

Gorgeous, you can be both knight and king… I am all your servant… Perhaps, I live up to my name for I am your genie forever…. Gorgeous, your wish is my command!!!!

You’re always in my thoughts. Take care and sleep tight!

My, My, Gorgeous❤️😘😍

Let me spill it out, you looked so dazzling today (as always). I am staring for a very long while you drifted into the land of your dreams. The rays of the sun touched your delicate handsome face, which melted my heart all over and over again. My, my, Gorgeous! What a lovely day, indeed! Let the wicked be consumed by their darkness but I am unbreakable this time. I made my stand because I don’t toil for the sake of the job or to get all the acknowledgements. I had my good intentions to help like I used to do wherever I am. I even volunteered to work without any compensation. So should I deny others that help they needed when I am given the gifts to save the day? I don’t want to be anyone’s saviour. All I want is to share what I have to lighten others’ burden.

Gorgeous, I only needed a day for you to see that I mean what I say. Look at the window in the vast land of Camelot where second chances are not impossible. Gorgeous, you have all doubts and questions. I won’t take it against you and I truly understand. For while you’re so occupied in your quest… I am left alone embracing the greater love in my heart, the comfort in my sleep and my inspiration in my waking days. Night and day, I say my sincere and heartfelt prayers for you. I’ll keep on writing, not caring if anyone will bother to read. For in the deepness of my being, I have a heart that doesn’t give up!

My, my, Gorgeous! You’re as as lovely as always… Perhaps, you’re a clone or replica of the gods resting far beyond the clouds. Certainly, one day, I’ll cross stitch the pattern of that handsome and youthful face of yours. Always kissing you good night… for the night is ours!!! See you later in that wildfire of that burning heat within! You know what I mean….

Gorgeous, Waitinglist to the Guilotine

My death sentence is reaching soon. The truth is, it affected my rest that caused pimples growing on my forehead and I consumed more recently. Likewise, I am trying my best to have the strength not to fear the ending. Then, I’m also teaching myself each day to accept this ill-fate gracefully. After all, death isn’t the conclusion of my dreams and hopes but a new phase to move forward for even a more purposeful existence. Besides, it is never my loss for my skills and talents will not cease with age instead it will increase with years that I will generously share even to those who are undeserving and unwilling.

I should be grateful to my heartaches because it taught me to be a better and stronger person. Aside from that, my heartaches lead me to the one granted by the Divine to me. I know too well that whatever there is, God will never abandon me. Even there’s no stopping for the authority to send me to the guilotine, it’s difinitely alright because when I am gone, no one can erase the marks I left to the majority.

Losing my old card is a blessing in disguise because it was already obsolete. See, bad things happen for a good reason! Lastly, my cross stitch is already done. My hardwork paid off… more cross stitchings and embroideries to come… I should do knitting too, Gorgeous!

Gorgeous, you look the most gorgeous today❤️😘😍❤️😘😍❤️😘😍

Gorgeous, sip the elixir of the scarred heart

Coward, invisible and hidden are my best qualities why I lost count of many good people whom I could possibly share my life. What can I do if I freeze and tremble inside? Or I can just remain quiet or wear the tough girl mask to keep my feelings to myself? So, I let my imaginations rule over me. Painting fantastic stories in my head is my favourite bedtime tales. Yet, I can’t deny it that my flesh is as hungry as everyone else all the time! Lucky that all my fantasies are the reel only playing at the cinema of my head. I am better off that the actor of my self-made film doesn’t have any idea at all for in that manner I saved myself in commiting any wrongdoings.

Gorgeous, my days are counted… time to update my credentials to find a place where lies aren’t the truth and I am not some means to conceal another’s frustrations, fears and insecurities. I am way better than how I am described, not because I am a wonderful being. It is because my desire to do extra mile for others. The truth is, I am committed and dedicated in all I do not for self-fulfillment but for the good of all creations.

It’s time to sip the elixir of the scarred heart to magically forget how I am deceived and to let go of the pains how my struggles ended up to the most unwelcoming place in the universe. Soon, the villains of Storybrooke will kick me away but I will leave with the joy in my heart. No matter what they’ll say, I will keep my head up high. The elixir won’t omit Gorgeous that first moment how your smile scared me in a thousand ways. The complications and after effects may have quite unusual details but I’m still glad because amdist of it all, I am reunited to my true self— the girl, my Papa raised… no drama only living in a beautiful world whereby there’s always hope after the rain. The sun will never stop shining and there’s a rainbow after a heavy storm. I should have known better because I’ve been there and done that!

Here I am, Gorgeous!

I failed for I was unprepared. I am so disoriented that I messed up. So, I confused myself with who was who. I was introduced to these five lovely and great men namely: Isaiah, Amos, Jeremiah, Elijah and Ezekiel. As I predicted last Monday, I did jumbled the names. Great! The kids still got me!!!

Then, my quest afterwards was a total failure too. I just couldn’t throw my cash just like thar for lost files. Yet, the great about that was I bought myself the equipment and materials to make the badges as my rewards for my deserving angels.

Here I am, Gorgeous! I am lost and disheartened because I am fully aware that whatever I will do no one will remember. At the end of it all. I am still joyous because God’s grace never abandoned me.

Here I am sent in a place to put my virtues into a test. No matter how I am treated, no one can take away the good intentions of my heart and my desires to share my kindness to as many people I can reach. From now inwards, I won’t give up of finding a new place where I can share my gifts. It is easy to kick people out but God always provide.

Here I am still loving you… may my love will bring you joy and a smile in your heart. I believe the best in everyone and no one is really bad… only we choose wrongly.

Kindness is Greatness, Gorgeous

In many situations, I did unnecessary things for the good of others despite all the hate and pressure that I received. Not because I am forced to do so or for appraisal, I’m judt doing the right to share my gifts to others. I maybe naive in many aspects but I am not stupid. Of course, the crown goes to the most cunning, deceiving and inconsiderate. Despite of my fears, I am still grateful to be with my angels, my only inspirations to keep on going even at the end, my hard work will absolutely a trash and mean nothing at all. I don’t care anymore because I know that I am continuously doing my best not expecting reward nor praise for it’s never wrong to be there for others in need.

I am old and penniless. I am not a head turner. I have nothing to offer unlike those hot babes on bikinis at the beaches of your favourite destinations. Of course, everybody loves the fun on the beach… I wonder what happens when the party is over? Will you not get bored of the beach or will carry on with what and who really matter the most? All I know is that I am not good on getting closer to people. That’s why as much as possible, I’ll act normal and keep to myself all the time. The girl who oftentimes hid in the library. I am just lucky for there were those who attempted to break my walls. Obviously, I treat everyone the same and write to the one very special even none of my composition is read. I don’t have the famous and wealthy bloodline running in my veins. I don’t have the power nor the status. I’m only good in loving honestly, truthfully and endlessly. As much as possible, I’ll do my best to choose what is right and share myself to those in need. I don’t have anything even I am always misunderstood and accused. For those who acknowledged my kindness (and don’t have amnesia or Alzheimer’s), they can see through my heart. After all, it’s all that matters Gorgeous and you undeniably also know. Kindness is greatness, Gorgeous. It is everything… No matter how many beaches or wherever beach you go, no fun waves can take away the seeds of kindness that I unselfishly shared. The truth will always prevail and goodness will conquer darkness,

There Goes the Black Monkey, Gorgeous!!!

So, it ended up 🤬 swearing ‘what the 🤬 … Well, the Whitney Houston’s song at the opening with the awkward editing and watermarked image reminded me of how my students projects handed to me. The millennial version of Spider-Man has its perks. It has the touch of the reality of the teens of the new generation who are deceived, imaging not living, fear responsibilities and unable to easily grasp what matter the most. I laughed at its light humour. It is not the classic touch of drama but unexpected of twist filled with action. It taught me that with eyes opened, we can easily be fooled with illusions. There are timed that we need to trust our instincts more! Another thing, life doesn’t work according to plan. Nothing comes smoothly but all we have to do is to face the music valiantly and wisely.

I am boring but I am perfectly fine with it❤️😍🥰

Once upon a time, Gorgeous

Once upon a time, I naively believed

All this time, I have the purest intentions

My heart is always genuine and true

Not a speck of cruelty and wickedness

Many cunning witches exist everywhere

Manipulating the weak for their triumphs

But their make to believe realms surely shatter

The bitterness and coldness are their downfall

For you only reap what you sow that’s I am certain

Evil begets evil and the humble is always lifted high

The rejected rock is the cornerstone of Heaven’s glory

For once upon a time, I believed in my dreams

I still believe and it is coming true in God’s time

You’re My Sunshine, Gorgeous!

So bright you were glowing like the sun

Your radiance made my tired eyes sparkle

Though you were not fine, you looked great!

I just didn’t a word, keeping the comments to myself

Better unsaid because I didn’t want to ruin your day

Glad you came, it would be gloomy without you

May my angels take care and their kisses from me

Let the winds whisper, “Gorgeous, you’re my sunshine

Yet, you’re radiance keep me away and I let things be

Hope one day you’ll see… my love is the greatest of them all!

I did something wrong, Gorgeous… to do something right…

It was wrong but I did it anyway—

I went out from my room, after 9 AM. My landlady asked worriedly and very concerned if everything was fine. My response, ‘Aunty, I have a big problem that’s why I am stuck in my room yesterday and today.’ The auntie’s worry grew bigger and she asked, ‘What’s your problem?’

Ok. What’s my issue anyway? Another drama, perhaps… Well, allow me to spill the beans in details, Gorgeous…

Friday was my last day to be ready for tomorrow. When I was about to print some files, my external hard disk wouldn’t open and my computer couldn’t read it too. I consulted a colleague and he told me that there was nothing he could do to fix it. Yet, my two years files were stored in that removable HDD!!! I felt there must be somthing that I could do and recalled what my student did who managed to recover my files when my USB Flash Driv crashed.

At the end of Friday, I was too excited to meet a friend for a movie. Then, when I am already out, I found out that I brought the wrong HDD with me. I was at the bus stop, so I went one big round to go back and take it. And since, I wouldn’t make it on time, my friend did cancel our appointment. I was good with it and there was no hurt feelings because I was sleepy due to the fact that I couldn’t bring myself to sleep from night till day (wide awake). So, I didn’t had dinner and went straight to bed when I reached home (no changing my clothes, brushing my teeth and cleaning my face), I even forgot to switch off my lights.

Saturday, I woke up quite late. Thank God that I had a good sleep! The first thing in my tto-do list yesterday was to find a solution for my broken HDD. The big question was, HOW?

My whole Saturday morning was spent on trying out a lot of recovery software trial versons. I was even ready to spend a box to procure one. After failing so many times, I decided to do the wrong way (against my vow of Cyber Wellness). Pan must be chasing me now because this Wendy became one of Hook’s pirate.

Oh my! I did something terribly wrong, Gorgeous to do something right, which I felt the solution to my BIG PROBLEM. I managed to get one but it indicated 600 hours of scanning even I let it run for over 5 hours. So, I unblocked the waves online and found a later version. It was quite faster but out of nowhere, after running for more or less 4 hours my computer crashed. So, I decided to uninstall and use the latest version of the software. But, it didn’t work coz it was the trial version and all the codes given were all incorrect. So, it was around 3AM on Sunday when I decided to reinstall the previous one. However, I couldn’t reuse the same code. I failed. My time wasted!!!!

See Gorgeous, sometimes, the solution to a problem are series of problems. Then, on top of it all, the device I was using couldn’t read the USB port. So, I needed to resolve that issue. On the other hand, I did so many things to make the software run again. Miraculously after several trial and error, it did! Likewise, the removable HDD was unresponsive. So, I made a crucial decision of reformatting it.

Moreover, I managed to fix for my PC to read the USB port. Nonetheless, the removable HDD wouldn’t read and it kept on disrupting my Explorer. I tried running the CMD commands to reformat the hard drive but it was unresponsive. I took a catnap and you were there before I woke up. So, I believed this could be resolved because I borrowed your expertise in my sleep. So, I tried thinking like you do…

It was already 4pm today when I decided not to attend the mass physically but through online streaming and received the Eucharist in spirit. I lifted all my fears and worries to the my Creator. After hearing and participating the mass, I decided to go out for dinner because I wanted to eat pork. Before I left, I had a long talk with a Friend… I exclaimed, ‘I will never rest until I avenge myself… My vengeance will be… WATCH OUT ALL THOSE WHO ARE WICKED COZ I AM GOING TO KILL THEM… KILL ‘EM WITH KINDNESS!’

Yes, I am gonna kill ’em with kindness. Wait, how about my problem!!! Let me see, I should be like you too. Probably, I have hidden expertise in hardware same as you are. I persevered and endured… after dinner… Cowabongga! I managed to REFORMAT THE HARD DISK USING CMD COMMANDS. So, there some truth in that dream. But, it was not something to feast because ALL MY FILES WERE DELETED😓😭😭😭 WHAT A BIG PROBLEM, INDEED😢


I received this many years ago in my previous working place. No matter what, I am that person who received this recognition and I am way much better version now. I am actually upgraded me!

I AM KNOWN TO BE AS WHAT STATED BELOW… I HAVE ALL THE TICK ON THIS CHECKLIST… Not, to impress anyone but this is who I am….

15 unmistakable qualities of bad managers

by Linda Le PhanNovember 8, 2018

 1. Takes credit for others’ work

“A good manager always takes responsibility for the performance of their team and won’t throw any of their team members “under the bus” while still providing the team members with all the praise in public, even for ideas that the manager would’ve come up with themselves. A bad manager is the opposite. They take all the credit and blame their employees for the failures, which obliterates trust and leads to the team starting to also cover for themselves as opposed to working for the best of the company.”

-Jesse Nieminen, Co-Founder Vilma


2. Doesn’t show appreciation or give recognition to employees

“We all like to be told we’ve done a great job, and some managers may overlook that when leading a team. You should always let people know when they’re doing a good job, it’s extremely motivating and shows you respect them professionally.”

-Matt Reaney, Founder of Big Cloud 


3. Micromanages

“A poor manager will micro-manage his or her team. They will see only one way to accomplish a task and will not value the input of others. Team members are not encouraged to grow, mistakes are frowned upon and unless a task is completed exactly as the manager wants it completed (even if completion in another manner achieves a positive outcome) the manager won’t recognize the success.”

-Cynthia Corsetti, CPCC, SPHR, Executive Leadership Coach at Cynthia Corsetti Coaching, LLC


 “A clear-cut sign of a bad manager is someone who jumps in and takes over every time there is a problem, even the slightest one. If your employees are resistant to bringing problems to you, because they fear you’ll take it over, there’s a good chance you are doing something wrong. A great manager rejects the dependence of the their teammates and instead asks “how would you solve this problem if I wasn’t here? The #1 role of a manager is to grow people, and when you solve a problem for them nobody grows.”

-Kevin Armstrong, Owner of The Alternative Board – Vancouver


4. Unable to trust (control freak)

“There are managers that are unable to give projects completely to their juniors. The junior will do the work, but everything needs to be funneled through to the manager for approval – which is ok on some things, but when a manager refuses to let anything go without approval, it results in bottlenecks. You’ll have juniors sitting around waiting for their manager to approve their work, so there’s a huge loss of productivity. Managers need to be able to trust the people they employ to do their work correctly.”

-Michael Sunderland, Managing Director at Full Stack Talent


“Similar to micromanagement, the untrusting manager wants the employee to get the work done, but is excessive in checking timing and details. They may feel that employees who are very successful are a threat, and so place greater emphasis in trying to catch them doing the wrong thing.”

-Richard Pummell, Human Resources Lead at DevelopIntelligence


5. Plays favorites

“Managers that pick out certain team members as their favorites are…bad news. Often there are some members of the team that are more similar in terms of culture, values or even work ethic, so it’s easy for managers to relate more easily to these people. However, when this results in them promoting their work over others, giving more weight to their opinions, or giving more assistance, it crosses the line. Other team members are quick to notice and can easily become disengaged as a result.”

-Fiona Adler, Founder of


“It can be hard to be recognised in the world of work, but even more so if your manager favours certain members of the team.

Staff can feel really unmotivated if they have a manager with favourites; it means their hard work goes unnoticed. Showing favouritism towards specific employees also leads members of the team to feel frustrated with the company dynamic when it comes to completing deadlines and making complaints about those certain members of staff.”

-Chris Wain, Sales Director for Africa Travel


6. Doesn’t provide clear or realistic direction

“A bad manager is one who does not clearly define for employees their responsibilities. This can lead to confusion amongst team members and work not getting done if no one understands that the tasks are their responsibility.”

-Nate Masterson, CEO of Maple Holistics


“[One thing you’ll find from bad managers is] setting unrealistic expectations with no guidance. There could be a lack of teamwork that is needed in order to complete a project. It is important for managers to know the difference between overworking their employees and challenging them. It is important for employees to be resourceful and learn their own way through a project, but it is also vital to show them the vital resources.”

-Jacob Dayan, Esq., CEO and Co-founder of Community Tax


7. Is unavailable or avoids tough conversations

“As a business owner, your door should always be figuratively and literally open to employees. It’s up to you to foster a collaborative environment, where team members feel comfortable approaching you with questions, concerns, new ideas, and even criticisms. If you set a tone of being too busy or too important for employees, you’ll likely miss out on the valuable insight they can offer.”

-David Scarola, Vice President of The Alternative Board


“Dealing with conflict is part of the job description for managers—in fact, a study from the American Management Association found that 24% of a manager’s day is spent managing conflict. It’s a challenging task that demands emotional intelligence along with an arsenal of conflict resolution techniques—and a manager simply isn’t doing their job if they shy away from conflict management responsibilities.”

-Ben Aston, Founder of The Digital Project Manager 

8. Lack of empathy or compassion (low emotional intelligence)

“Effective leadership at any level requires the ability to recognize and control one’s own emotions. It also requires the ability to show empathy, recognize and influence the emotions of others. A poor manager lacks this skill.”

-Cynthia Corsetti, CPCC, SPHR, Executive Leadership Coach at Cynthia Corsetti Coaching, LLC

Another quality of a bad manager is not caring if their employees are overworked. An employee’s mental health is crucial to the employee’s life as well as their productivity at work, and a boss who is not in tune with what their employees are experiencing does not value the needs of their employees.”

-Nate Masterson, CEO of Maple Holistics

9. Unable to listen and respond to feedback (poor listener)

“This is probably the most damaging characteristic that a manager can have. They won’t listen to a person speaking and therefore they never truly get to the route of the issue. Instead, the manager hears a few words and begins to interrupt with a solution, which may not even be the right solution because they didn’t truly listen to the problem. The manager with poor listening skills has no chance of having a productive and effective team.”

-Cynthia Corsetti, CPCC, SPHR, Executive Leadership Coach at Cynthia Corsetti Coaching, LLC

10. Doesn’t lead by example

“I’m sure everyone’s seen a manager who talks to their employees about the times being tough and everyone having to work longer hours for the same pay, then leaving the office early to play golf. While hypocrisy often isn’t this obvious, it’s a common problem with far-reaching consequences for the morale and performance of the team, as well as the credibility of the manager. A manager always leads by example, whether they want it or not.”

-Jesse Nieminen, Co-Founder of Viima 


11. Lacks humility or self-awareness

“I believe lack of humility is a trait of a bad manager because, even though they are in a position of leadership, managers don’t have all the answers. If they pretend like they do (and I have seen many managers/leaders do this), then they end up wasting time and valuable resources. A good manager realizes they can’t accomplish everything on their own and that’s when they’re able to leverage the strengths of their team.”

-Tyler Hanna, CEO and Co-Founder of 8-bit Rex


“[Some bad managers] have such low self-awareness that they blame others for their own failings. They don’t see how their action and inaction contribute significantly to the problems they have.”

-Michael Wilkinson, CMF, CPF, Founder and Managing Director of Leadership Strategies, Inc. and Author of “The Secrets of Facilitation”


12. Manages with fear, not fairness

“The manager [who leads with fear] wants employees to feel they are lucky to have a job, and whenever a request is made it includes a tacit threat that if the request isn’t delivered, there will be ramifications down the road. This can also include the manager who selects favorites and gives others the cold shoulder – and will frequently change how they treat an individual employee. Employees never know where they stand, and generally dislike any interactions with the manager.”

-Richard Pummell, Human Resources Lead at DevelopIntelligence


“The old-style “my way or the highway” mindset of management has no place in modern society, but there are still plenty of managers out there that try to lead this way. While a fear-based style might get some short-term results, the long-term negative impact will always be more substantial. Servant leadership is the only way to drive consistent results in a business world now that is as complex and dynamic as it’s ever been.”

-Kris Hughes, Senior Content Marketing Manager at


13. Is complacent about poor performing or toxic team members

“Keeping a bad teammate on the team is poor decision. It’s not doing any service to the weak team member and it’s not fair to all the other teammates. It is the most dangerous and most common sign of a weak manager by suffering a poor performing team member and not cutting them loose before it’s too late.”

-Zach Hendrix Co-Founder of GreenPal


14. Doesn’t follow through or recognize their own responsibilities

“One of the main qualities I see in a bad manager is that they think they get more freedoms, when in fact they actually get more work. I’ve seen it time and time again, someone becomes a manager and thinks they don’t have to follow all the rules or do the small duties it takes to maintain a team. In short, they get lazy, and there’s no quicker way to get your team to quit on you than by being egotistical and entitled.”

-Nick Glassett, Founder of


“Countless managers receive requests, questions, concerns etc from their team and either 1) never respond or 2) respond and then fail to follow through. This can be very demotivating for team members and sets the tone for a company culture of dropping the ball. Great managers are so organized, their team knows they can count on them to follow up.”

-Kevin Armstrong, Owner of The Alternative Board – Vancouver


“This person is the opposite extreme [of a micromanager]. They think that they can get everyone working at capacity with just the very occasional bit of guidance. They often arrive late, take long lunches, and leave early on a regular basis. They over-value the contribution of their strategic thinking and are quick to take credit for their team members’ work. Pretty soon, people resent these types of managers.”

-Fiona Adler, Founder of


15. Doesn’t live up to workplace values

“Bad managers will demonstrate inconsistencies in the values of the company. They might advertise the principles as part of the mission statement, but their day-to-day actions say otherwise. And of course: Actions speak louder than words. Research shows, inconsistencies in values is recipe for employee burnout.”

-Nicholas Hobson, Workplace Psychologist and Co-Founder of PsychologyCompass.

A Better Bitter Sweet Love, Gorgeous!

Gorgeous. Father Garcia said if you don’t want evil or something bad on Earth, by all means go ahead and migrate to Mars! (Can I go now?) He added that in this world all of imperfect creations co-exist with one another, the worst is always expected. After all, the root of all evil is something good. Well, I had the chances to leave but I stayed on because of my passion not only in fashion but also in art and technology (first on the list). These give hype to me in keeping my blood boiling. Previously, in doing what I love, it never occurred to me that I made a difference and impacted others as well. Truly, I am grateful to all those people who see my contributions and good intentions rather my flaws. Thank you very much to those countless people who sincerely said thank you for what I have done rather than rolling their eyes and say negatively about me.

Thanks to my SVDP Catechism Ministry for giving me the room to grow in faith and virtues that I am able to apply in real life situations. I always reminded the kids in my session the maxims of forgiveness and loving the enemies. In my current situation, I needed that and so I am struggling to walk the talk.

Well, in many instances, the power of the witch may very effective in manipulating others. Indeed, the winner takes it all!!! But, not all those who lose are the losers in the game of life because it can be lonely in the throne. Indeed, there’s winning in losing!!! At least, I am in that situation again (here comes the witch, Bloody Ink part 2)whereby I am given the death sentence and my days are numbered. Honestly, it’s quite sad but I am going to seize this moment to continuously do my best and love more (more and more, NEVER GIVING UP). The worthiness of my existence isn’t define of how others judge me… it is what I do to be there for others with all the good intentions in my heart and to glorify the Almighty. Before, I felt the injustice… but why count a few when I did a lot for so many?

Feeling super down today… then, I sipped the coffee that a colleague gave me. I am so grateful that I didn’t miss dropping him a message of saying ‘thank you’. When I sipped it, it was really bitter but the kind gesture reminded me that a tree isn’t made of withered leaves and dead branches… it has so many parts that make it very beautiful!

Early this morning, my friend reminded me about another mission for this coming December. I am so grateful indeed for another opportunity to serve. I have all the disappointments and sadness for this kind of love. Does it matter? When LOVE is the greatest of all, in whatever forms… I am honoured to have this chance to love what and who I love— I don’t have nine lives same as a cat. I only have one life to live… I can’t runoff to the monastery anymore and no more hiding this time… Moreover, I have to walk the eye of the storm because my destination is to be with my father and thy Father. Gorgeous, I go on loving and loving, for my insanity today will matter tomorrow.

The ball will keep on rolling and I am beating on a set of losing cards… in the end of the game, I won’t get the prize only to treasure the experience for with God’s grace I am triumphant in many ways.

Raindrops fell towards the end. But when I saw my students’ works (thank God I put up all those things there), I found the joy in my heart because I am given the chance to share what I love. One colleague told me, her daughter said that she’s excited for school to reopen to see me again (or the computers). Another colleague said, her son really loved my lessons last year. Well, I hope not only bad wind will reach the throne. Maybe, the soft and naive dandelions will reach them too. See, Gorgeous… it is indeed a better bitter sweet love!

…that old style, Gorgeous⛩

No denying it, I’m proud to be old and very much grateful to be borne yesterday.

In the era where I belonged, I was groomed in a different mindset of how young women are today. Before men appreciate women who were homebody and could do household chores. Well, plus points to those who could do all kinds of sewing. Indeed, you were very admirable if you obeyed everyone specially God.

Nowadays, dream offthose qualities meant nothing… Men will droll on pretty faces online and won’t bother them if those photos are filtered or undergone by the knife. The more vain and narcissistic you are, the more you are worshipped… parade all the brands for it’s all about the labels and price tags.

So what? I’m not threatened because I don’t exist to please a virtual audience and even others as well. I may sound so laid off and living in the cave but I still love to read printed books, paint sometimes.., and know back to that old style—cross stitching!

I let people be… Hope one day, I can make someone truly happy. Good night. Gorgeous! And I love you so… time to pray now and each night and day, I never failed saying my little heartfelt prayer for you. Again and again, I love you so—

Those Little Voices, Gorgeous…

The countdown of my days

The feast of the witches

After all, who suffers more

May I endure and persevere

Rotten apples are poisonous

Not for me but all theirs

Their evil scheme is their end

I will stand against their wrath

My Prince Charming will see

I don’t need him to rescue me

For I love him for who he is

His flaws won’t discourage me

His imperfections and errors

The uniqueness of his being

Gorgeous, the witch’s unstoppable

Lucky, I have my innocent allies

They too have little voices

May their songs of praises

Reach the throne of the queens

In their tender sweet ages

They also have something to say

Whatever the witch’s plot be

I am not giving up anymore

Continuously loving life and you

In those children no one can take

The sincere difference I made

Serving everyone with good intentions

Always my joy to be there for others

God may the witch find You

For she’s welcome in heaven too

She will never see my goodness

It’s alright for I know I’m doing my best!

Mercy, Gorgeous🙏🏻

In the ocean of strangers

I am and have nothing

Unnoticeable face

The unknown servant

Humbly genuflecting on You

All I want is to bring joy

Share happiness to all

Use my gifts for others

Yet, all seen are my flaws

Finding faults to the fullest

I don’t want to please, Gorgeous

Only want to do good deeds

May my pure intentions

Not be taken incorrectly

Mercy, Gorgeous! I pray

Erase the anger and envy

Let my love shine the brightest

The light to one’s darkness

You don’t punish anyone

Even those who are lost

Show them your mercy

Hope I can love like You do

I am absolutely nothing

For you, I am everything

Mercy, Gorgeous! I pray

I love you very much, you know…

Blood on Petals (Gorgeous)

The clock strikes five

Everyone on their knees

Praise to the Blessed Mother

Glory to the Almighty King!

Reverence to His greatness

He died for my salvation

His awesome blood shared

Little flower girls on the isle

Like angels on white and wreath

The scent of flowers on my hand

Dancing on the pretty petals

My Majesty never walks away

Glorify You, Gorgeous! I love you so…

Helping out with the flower girls and lighting the candles at the church’s entrance (well, forgive me Lord for looking…indeed, there were plenty of cute fishes in the sea!😂😆) Today’s the celebration of the Feast Day of Corpus Christi… for the first time for more than 2 decades of existence, SVDP had a procession to honour the blood and body of the living God. (*Dies Sanctissimi Corporis et Sanguinis Domini Iesu Christi  Latin for “Day of the Most Holy Body and Blood of Jesus Christ the Lord”, also known as Solemnity of the Corpus Christi[2]) is a Christian liturgical solemnitycelebrating the Real Presence of the Body and Blood, Soul and Divinity of Jesus Christ in the elements of the Eucharist. Source:

(I was the candle bearer)

L3 First Holy Communion with the backdrop that I rushed and last minute designed.

Gorgeous, it’s you all this time

Tragic news for someone I know fired a bullet straight into his heart… So young to take away his life because of brokenness in despair. Indeed, I am fortunate to have found and known you.

It’s true that I am one hopeless romantic by kept on linking and finding connection to that voice to all those I used to know… Shame on me for not recognizing you! I should have known but of course I am always overpowered with my fantasies rather than my faith. If yesterday I identified you immediately, I should have followed you without any hesitation. Thank you for giving me the strength and always encouraging me to go on despite the fault finding. Thank you for making me brave all the time no matter how many times there are people who are bringing me down.

Honestly, I am quite disappointed to uncover the truth. However, you are more than anyone… the greatest of them all!

Thank you, Gorgeous! I am truly aware that YOU know how I love YOU heartily with all I am. Thank you for making me a better person and inspiring me to give my best in all I do. No one may see and appreciate me but it’s alright because there’s You, my ONE & ONLY YOU.

So late have I loved You, Gorgeous❤️😘🥰

You were within me, but I was outside

And it was there that I searched you

According to St Augustine, “you made us for yourself, O Lord, and our hearts are restless until they rest in you.”

There is no good and evil, there is only power and those too weak to seek it. The only thing necessary for the triumph of evilis for good men to do nothing. To see evil and call it good, mocks God.

The Unveiling (I did it, Gorgeous!)🌫

Definitely so overjoyed

Dancing all night long

I did it, Gorgeous!

See and be proud too

It arrived today

The unveiling of art

My design on canvas

From my PC to print

Astounded in disbelief

No hiding and inferiority

Standing still in the light

Shining with the stars

As radiant as the sun

As beautiful as you are

God, thanks for my gifts

Sharing my skills

Serving You with all I am!

(Helping out the 1st day of FHC retreat by manning the Clothed on Christ prayer station)

Gorgeous, Have You Been to the Hidden Temple of the Dragons?

Are you praying every morning and during night time?

Are the ones you desire only bring you satisfaction?

Happiness is contentment within, it isn’t forced

It is not available online, not something you can buy

I may not very persuasive but one day you’ll agree

In your travel, did you make a stopover on a holy place?

Have you been to the hidden temple of the dragons?

It is not the place for the desperate but for grateful hearts

Our God does not punish us with lightning from heavens

We will not be condemned but always honoured & rewarded

It shelters us away from fears and shields us from our foes

It is our sanctuary in our downfall, simply at home

Gorgeous, may the Divine’s wisdom aid you in the truth

Whatever it be, let’s celebrate life and sing all sorts of songs

Why hate when love is in us and always around us everyday?

The love you know is only the love you want but not need

In the hidden temple of the dragons, love is overflowing

Find me there, waiting genuinely, tirelessly and patiently

Never giving up despite the many odds and uncertainties

Number increases but there’s no anxieties & wrinkles in my soul

My spirit is always youthful, it remains forever young

Why bother about counting when eternity is in after life?

Be there in the hidden temple of the dragons and be merry

For I am always there for you, I never left for I AM HERE TO STAY!

Gorgeous, I don’t know

I don’t know your side of the story

I won’t push so hard to find out

Whatever that stir your emotions

May time and space calm you down

I don’t know if I miss you at all

But funny how the brain registers

The scents of your cigar and morning coffee

The sound of your voice and the look on your face

I don’t know where you are in the globe

Hope you’re having the time of your life

Doing the extremes, making the extraordinary

Always in the spirit, not alone in the crowd

I don’t know what tomorrow will be

Still I keep my hopes high, doing my best all the time

Not asking so much what others can’t give

I will just remain to be true and love everything I do

I don’t know those rules, I don’t live by them

As long as the intentions are authentic and pure

No one can go wrong and let judgments be

Let’s embrace happiness for liberty is ours anyway

I don’t know if you hear the genuineness in my voice

Still I continuously pray for you everyday

It’s through God, I am reaching to you

Embracing you when your day turns imperfect

I don’t know anything and many things

I am born in those vintage days when life is simple

Pictures are not filtered and photoshopped

Not in a fake show in front of an audience in social media

I don’t know what happened to you yesterday

Still you’re that same person better that everyone else

We are not aliens for the world is ours to conquer

We are all angels for there’s goodness resides in all of us

(Last Sunday, in Father Eugene’s sermon he stated that all of us feel lonely. The more people you are surrounded with, the lonelier you are… The more you hang around technology, the more the desperation and frustration arise within. The more fame and power you’ll gain, the faster that emptiness in no time will eat you inside out. There’s always that hollowness within that’s why welcome those who are true for through them you’ll see your path clearly.)

An eye for an eye, Gorgeous

MATTHEW 5:38-42

Jesus said to his disciples: “You have heard that it was said, An eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth. But I say to you, offer no resistance to one who is evil. When someone strikes you on your right cheek, turn the other one to him as well. If anyone wants to go to law with you over your tunic, hand him your cloak as well. Should anyone press you into service for one mile, go with him for two miles. Give to the one who asks of you, and do not turn your back on one who wants to borrow.”


When someone strikes you on your right cheek, turn the other one to him as well. (Matthew 5:39)

No pain, no gain. You reap what you sow. The punishment should fit the crime. These sayings express our belief in natural consequences and proportional justice. In today’s Gospel reading, Jesus addresses the Jewish version of this principle: “An eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth” (see Leviticus 24:20). It may sound harsh to us, but the people would have understood it as a merciful commandment that curbed anger and placed a limit on revenge.

But even that’s not merciful enough for Jesus. He tells his listeners to turn the other cheek and to offer no resistance whatsoever to an enemy. By going beyond what’s challenging but reasonable, Jesus gets to the heart of the Law: the disproportionate, undeserved mercy of God.

Looking back at these words through the lens of Jesus’ death and resurrection, we can see how he perfectly fulfilled this command. But it wasn’t only during his final days that Jesus turned the other cheek. According to St. John Paul II,

Turning the other cheek is hard, but don’t get discouraged. Jesus knows how hard it is. He won’t condemn you if you should fall to the temptation to seek revenge or to withhold forgiveness. He’ll simply do what he has always done—turn the other cheek, forgive you, and offer you more of his grace to do better.

“Jesus, thank you for your constant mercy and grace!”

(Today’s bible reading reflection courtesy of my friend)

(The banner I designed as a backdrop on the stage for next week’s event. I didn’t expect that I would asked to this. I’m grateful that I have skills to share in the service of God. I know in my heart He listens and He’s not blind to my loneliness and daily struggles.)

Gorgeous, Always Making Paps the Proudest❤️🥰😍

Paps, you were my avid fan and even I was quiet of my extracurricular activities, nothing was kept secret to you. Even if I was grumpy and indolent at times, you knew very well that I am capable of doing a lot of things. Guess what, I have improved now and learned new things. Recently, I learned how to bake different kinds of bread and saw clothes. Aside from manual and digital drawing and painting, I painted on 3D models. My student called the artworks as 3D sculptures. But, it doesn’t look nice for now… I’ll just keep trying to improve myself. Next in line, I’m going to do cross stitch. I only hope I can do something sporty to add on my list.

As of today, it was not my intention after the 6pm mass but I did anyway because the girl in my session couldn’t make for the rehearsal for next week’s procession. I promised her Mother that I would relay the details of the rehearsal. So, I helped by assisting the pretty little flower girls… The whole thing ended very late and I reached home around 10.30pm.

Imagine, Paps did it ever occur to you that I am going to be a Catechist or become a teacher? I was the lazy one among my siblings with regards to school matters. And on top of that, I was the rebel yet admired and loved by so many. Look at me now, I guess people do change. One thing remain the same I am still the jolly one.

(My own version of optical illusion in digital art using PicsArt app)

I dreamt of you smiling at me. I woke up with joy and contentment in my heart. Thank you for everything. I love you very much and I won’t get tired of praying and dreaming of you.

Gorgeous, My Heart Still Remains True

Nothing can change one’s destiny but it doesn’t matter as long as the heart remains true. Perhaps, I am such a pain in your point of view but I am a blessing to others. Anyone has the right to hate me for being true to myself, I won’t question or judge them. Instead, I’ll just continue to do good deeds and do my best in everything I do. Honestly, I am disappointed of myself today because I was unable to meet my goal. I was all worried in my head because I failed to compile everything. Of course, I needed all the diversions because I was so stressed with how time flew so fast and I still had so many things left undone.

Gorgeous, I had nothing more to say because I already wrote my side of the story. A priest once told me that there was nothing incorrect of expressing myself. Moreover, how my words be taken isn’t in my control. Thus, all I could do is to accept my fate and move forward. After all, I am certain of what I am doing despite how my actions are misunderstood. I don’t have to beg or convince or manipulate others to win them over…. no need to try so hard. Let things be for now and let time pacify a heart in fury. Above all, allow God to heal one’s wrath in order to see with clarity and be able to unmask who is who. One thing is certain, when one is not in the room, I am not the one who has so many ill things to say. Be careful who is in front of you and always with because they are the ones very dangerous and have a lot of things to say. As wise men always say, “one’s greatest enemy isn’t the person one hated the most but surprisingly it is someone who is only within the circle”.

As of the moment, my major concern is losing weight because I can’t fit in most of my clothes (no bodycon for me only oversized will do) and my face is so bloated…. I AM NECK-LESS!!! (as always😔😖) I am so overweight that I can’t walk on my high heels. Now, I have no choice but to wear sneakers and flats. Sad life, indeed… Haha! Joke…

No more procastinations… zumba more and complete the 10,000 steps a week!!! Haay, many things left unaccomplished.

Well, whatever there is and however everyone treats me, my heart still remains true for that’s the only thing I know how to do❤️😍

Gorgeous, Blessed are We😇😘

Not so long ago, numbers did threaten me

Fantasies ruled over, a search in desperation

Hurting the one who never did me wrong

Trying so hard in portraying a bad version of me

Opening the doors forbidden, a route of no return

Blissfulness was brief for the sorrow was more

No joy in sins for my spirit was burned in hell

Just a single step, I was falling out from grace

How blessed I am for God never abandoned me!

I turned Him down thrice but He never gave up

Thank you Lord for sending me good people

Pulling me out from the darkness of my narrow tunnel

Thank you Lord for sharing me Your wisdom

My directions to always follow the right path

Gorgeous, we are blessed because we are loved more


(I told my friend about the good news today and I also said the words below)

Yesterday, I searched in desperation

Thus, I fell out from grace

Today, God is my rock and salvation

So, I believe everything will fall into place🙏🏻❤️😇